going back to my first love ....http://softwarebhai.blogspot.com/
ego
There is this small part within every single one of us that craves to be fed..that yearns to be satisfied and ironically never is.
It makes me wonder how much is actually enough for the human ego to reach its 'satiety' point??
Its a simple logic----i feed your ego, you like me..i hurt it and you hate me like there is no tomorrow.
so where does the truth stand in all this pampering?
or does it really have a place at all?
I have ended up unknowingly experimenting along those lines and judged reactions..many a times, i have gone right ahead and blurted out the truth, just to see what really matters.
and as expected, have felt the vibes of hatred towards my frankness steaming in my direction?
'your makeup is too loud today' i once told my friend when she asked me how she looked..she gazed into the mirror and did what she thought was 'toning it down' and asked me if it was okay..to which i gave her an honest answer and told her it was still looking a little garish and that she should opt for milder shades.
Little did i know then, that i was hurting her ego.
It was only when she started dripping sarcasm for a good consecutive five days after the episode that i actually realised where it was coming from.
so u see how it goes, i agree with you, compliment you, support you irrespective of whether i think its right or wrong and you will like me..
If i am honest, i end up hurting your sentiments.
EGO i have realised, is one of the most dangerous of human emotions.
Its not that i haven't fallen prey to it myself, i have too.
It spares noone and ends up destroying the best of relationships.
Pride keeps interfering and keeps us away from confronting the issue and sorting out the problem.
we wait for the other to take a step forward which is what the other waits for too---end result, an issue which is never sorted, an intact ego and ironically, a relationship left in broken pieces, which are impossible to put together.
and then again, there is the convenience with which we label the demon as 'self respect' when it comes to our own self and 'super-ego' when it comes to others----mere self consolation which we hope will last us a lifetime, to save us the guilttrip.
but i ask, is it really worth it??
ego...the reason apologies are not given!
ego...the reason why the silence keeps growing!
ego...the reason the void continues to deepen!
ego...the reason we misunderstand without knowing!
Its a simple logic----i feed your ego, you like me..i hurt it and you hate me like there is no tomorrow.
so where does the truth stand in all this pampering?
or does it really have a place at all?
I have ended up unknowingly experimenting along those lines and judged reactions..many a times, i have gone right ahead and blurted out the truth, just to see what really matters.
and as expected, have felt the vibes of hatred towards my frankness steaming in my direction?
'your makeup is too loud today' i once told my friend when she asked me how she looked..she gazed into the mirror and did what she thought was 'toning it down' and asked me if it was okay..to which i gave her an honest answer and told her it was still looking a little garish and that she should opt for milder shades.
Little did i know then, that i was hurting her ego.
It was only when she started dripping sarcasm for a good consecutive five days after the episode that i actually realised where it was coming from.
so u see how it goes, i agree with you, compliment you, support you irrespective of whether i think its right or wrong and you will like me..
If i am honest, i end up hurting your sentiments.
EGO i have realised, is one of the most dangerous of human emotions.Its not that i haven't fallen prey to it myself, i have too.
It spares noone and ends up destroying the best of relationships.
Pride keeps interfering and keeps us away from confronting the issue and sorting out the problem.
we wait for the other to take a step forward which is what the other waits for too---end result, an issue which is never sorted, an intact ego and ironically, a relationship left in broken pieces, which are impossible to put together.
and then again, there is the convenience with which we label the demon as 'self respect' when it comes to our own self and 'super-ego' when it comes to others----mere self consolation which we hope will last us a lifetime, to save us the guilttrip.
but i ask, is it really worth it??
ego...the reason apologies are not given!
ego...the reason why the silence keeps growing!
ego...the reason the void continues to deepen!
ego...the reason we misunderstand without knowing!
while u were sleeping
some things to be told...
some reasons to be given...
some secrets to be confided...
some moments to be shared
some memories to be cherished...
some tears to be shed...
some truths to be confronted...
some issues to be discussed...
some doubts to be cleared...
some fears to be expressed...
some actions to be explained...
i stare at my reflection in the mirror and for once it tells me to think with my heart and not with my mind.
all of a sudden, i find myself facing a temporary lapse of reason..of logic..
i wait with bated breath half nervous and half anxious ..until im swept away by the dark night into the land of dreams---with these unspoken thoughts still roaming in my head...
but i realise that the morning sun will bring back the harsh wrath of a bitter reality along with it.
try as i might to listen to my heart, it will take me by the hand and pull me into a practical world where logic reigns supreme...
where the realisation that you might never realise how simple it is for you to triumph over that logic if only you tried, will dawn upon once again...
where unspoken thoughts will remain unspoken, maybe just because the moment passed by...while you were sleeping
and tomorrow will still be another day---but perhaps one very different!
